I realized..

that iv been bad..

back in HS i was the mean girl of the campus.. hated by everyone except my friends.. i treat all enemies as trash & get rid of anyone who gets in the way!

but when i was transferred to FCAN (a christian school) my life changed.. ive become nice, sweet, almost loved by everyone.. i remember those days.. i was so happy.. everything seems so fun & simple..

years after graduation, things happened.. i can say that the mean girl in me appeared again.. i started to hate some of my friends for petty reason.. years passed, those whom i considered best friends have been forgotten & hated.. this past few days, i started talking to them again, i felt guilt.. its like a sharp knife is cutting through me.. i missed my friends! i remember the happy memories we've had.. the feeling of happiness when i am still with them.. now, im asking myself.. "what went wrong?" asking myself if they could still accept me after all that happened..

what happened to me? they are one of the precious people i wanted to keep & now im not sure if i can still do that.. not now that ive already hurt them..

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